It doesn't do to make things worse

[alt_daphne]

Has anyone else been finding this "School-Wide Mid-Year Quiz" laying about? Elsie and I just found a copy in our common room, and really?

This on top of the news about Cassie is all combining to make for a very foul day.

Which isn't to say that I don't appreciate that my sense of glamour is well-regarded, among other things, but honestly, just because one has natural talent at something doesn't make one an irritating show-off.

Comments

[alt_draco]

Any idea who's behind this? Because I'd like to have a word, if so.

[alt_daphne]

No, I only wish!

You're not the only one who's feeling stung, Draco, but I have to say that you could have come off a lot worse.

You were, after all, listed as Most Glamorous, Best All Around Male Specimen, and Quickest Wit.

Well, and "Epic Posh-Arse" doesn't necessarily have to be a bad thing, in my opinion. And "Most Likely to Meet a Nasty End" just means that yours and Harry's lifestyles are very thrilling, I'm sure.

[alt_draco]

You forgot one.

[alt_daphne]

Don't be silly, Draco, I'm sure that just means that you'll be marrying a woman.

[alt_blaise]

That category.

Whoever wrote this thing had better hope no one ever finds out. Honestly, how incredibly stupid to put you and Marvolo both there. I'm not sure it's treason exactly, but it's definitely not clever.

[alt_draco]

Not to mention that it's utterly untrue rubbish.

[alt_pansy]

Indeed.

[alt_draco]

Glad to hear you agree.

[alt_blaise]

Don't take it too hard. Clearly whoever wrote it envies you rather desperately. (Irritation is a side effect of envy. Sour grapes, you know.)

Still, some of the categories were inappropriately personal.

(Though I must say I don't mind being recognised in the bad boy category. With Bole, no less. I think perhaps that's another oblique compliment to you!)

[alt_daphne]

Good point about irritation!

I might be more amused by it if today weren't already in sixes and sevens, what with exams, Cassie, and everything else going on.

Given the nature of some of the observations, I would surmise that it was definitely written by females.

Do you suppose a "trouser librarian" is what it sounds like it is?

[alt_hydra]

Well, I figured it out, seeing as it's a list of all-boys. So yes, I think it's what it sounds like it is.

From,
Hydra

[alt_daphne]

You?

You must be pleased, Hydra, that whoever wrote the quiz sees you and Harry as a destined couple.

[alt_hydra]

Yes, but they also wrote that Antigone Fletcher and Anthony Rickett were a destined couple, and everyone knows they hate one another. And I don't think Sally Anne talks to Miles Bletchley very often. It's all just meant to confuse people anyway.

From,
Hydra

Private message to Hydra

[alt_sally_anne]

I don't.

Because he's a DISGUSTING PIG.

I don't know if he'd ever mess with you, but if he ever touches you 'by accident,' it wasn't an accident. So don't feel bad about using that same hex on him I heard you did on the boys from Beauxbatons.

Re: Private message to Hydra

[alt_hydra]

Bletchley tried to touch you? I suppose you mean you didn't want him to.

Do you want me to teach you that hex?

From,
Hydra

Re: Private message to Hydra

[alt_sally_anne]

Do you remember when my rat bit Bletchley last year? That was because he'd grabbed my breast. Again.

And yes, I'd love to learn that hex.

Re: Private message to Hydra

[alt_hydra]

I can teach you, it's not very difficult because I learnt it back when I was just a firstie.

It's not a very nice hex, but I don't think it counts as dark arts that can kill someone.

From,
Hydra

Re: Private message to Hydra

[alt_sally_anne]

Well those boys from Beauxbatons survived, I heard. I don't think they even had to go to the hospital wing.

Re: Private message to Hydra

[alt_hydra]

It was only Coty who got hexed, and Toubon who helped him walk off.

I think it works the same way as kicking them in the bollocks would.

I'm worried, though, that they'll keep after Justin more than ever now.

From,
Hydra

Re: Private message to Hydra

[alt_sally_anne]

They might.

I don't know if there's much you can do about that, unfortunately. Unless you have friends in Ravenclaw you could have keep an eye out.

[alt_blaise]

I've never heard the term, but it's a perfect description of the way Begy and Derwent go about holding their books up as if that didn't just call massive attention to what they're hiding.

I assumed that girls didn't really notice it, but it's dead obvious to a wizard when someone's trying to hide his wand like that.

[alt_daphne]

It's certainly going to be obvious to me from here on out!

And when I said that girls must've written it, I was referring more specifically to the two categories dedicated to male anatomy.

[alt_blaise]

Well, there was rather specific and unflattering comment on girls' anatomy in the quiz, too. But you're probably right. If boys had written it, there'd be a Best Endowed category for witches, not just the Bra Stuffers one.

A coincidence that the two witches Weasley asked to the ball ended up there? I think not. 'Forever Virgins' is the most accurate part of the whole list, don't you agree?!

I Solemnly Swear That I Am Up To No Good

[alt_ron]

Shut up, you.

[alt_daphne]

Precisely - nothing in there at all about who best fills out the robes of Nefertiti!

Time will tell, though I think in Smith's case, at least, it's a definite yes if he keeps up as is.

Private message to Blaise

[alt_daphne]

So, by what criteria do you think "seriously slutty" is gauged?

You know, I have half a mind to conclude Astoria is behind this .

I'll have to hex her, just in case she is

Re: Private message to Blaise

[alt_blaise]

I didn't take it seriously at all. I mean to say, you were listed just beneath Remy Jugson! And they put in and crossed out Pansy, which is just daft. I mean, really? Who do they want us to think she's done it with when they're also taking the piss about Draco being least likely to marry a girl? No one thinks that's what she gets up to with Weasley!

So, no. I don't think that list made any particular sense at all.

You should probably still hex Astoria. Just on principle.

Private Message to Daphne Greengrass and Draco Malfoy

[alt_blaise]

Wonderful.

Now the Head Bint is telling everyone to turn over the quiz and not read it. Such effective leadership!

Re: Private Message to Daphne Greengrass and Draco Malfoy

[alt_draco]

Too right and then some.

She really know show to put out a fire by casting Incendio, doesn't she?