Daphne Greengrass

Mother,

I've had an owl from Queenie this morning. She was terribly distressed. She said that you and Father had a row last night that woke her up from sleep. You and Father never row; she had no idea what to think and is worried that it means she's done something to cause it.

I can only presume that your argument was about this week's Dish! Really, Mother, Father may not follow that kind of press, but you had to know that it would get back to him, one way or another. I can't imagine that any man would enjoy seeing his wife discuss her past love life in a magazine, but you know how private Father is. It's just as Grandmother always said: "he shies away from the limelight so that it will better reach the rest of us."

Now, Mother, prepare yourself for hard words: it really doesn't do to entertain a fantasy based on the mere possibility of something.

And it isn't fair to me, or to Father. Or to HIM, for that matter. You have to tell him that the possibility exists, and then the matter can be solved in short order, I'm sure. And I really need to kn

If you won't say something to him, I suppose it will be up to me.

Love,
Daphne

I know we already coordinated before breakfast, Millie, but I really need to make sure that this all goes according to plan! So, I'll write everything out here for you to study during Potions. I'll do all the stirring, and you hold your Potions book with your journal tucked inside so that you can put this to memory. Just make sure Professor Slughorn doesn't see what we're up to. Here's the plan:

1) After Astronomy lecture at 3 we go to the Defense classroom. Professor Raz is holding extra practise duelling sessions on account of exams, so there will probably be a lot of students there besides us, but that's alright. It just means we have to be extra convincing.
2) We will volunteer to be partners, and when it's our turn, I'll cast one of the double-shield spells we've been working on in Defence, only really, I'll just cast a single shield spell, and I'll make it rather weak. That's when you cast your stinging hex. Now, be sure to turn your wrist to the LEFT and not the RIGHT. This is important! Because you know that your stinging hexes are really awful, normally, but if you turn your wrist to the left it's much weakened and I'll barely feel a thing.
3) Now, you mustn't be frightened by this next part. I'm going to act as if your stinging-hex was full strength and let loose a loud, convincing scream. I mean to say that it will be very convicing. Your ears will hurt and you will probably think that you've hurt me terribly. But you haven't, don't worry!
4) And now I'm going to act very, very angry. Expect me to stamp my feet and shout at you. I might even be mean and nasty enough to make you tear up and tremble. I don't mean it, of course, but you'll have to THINK I mean it if any of this is going to look convincing.
5) Then comes the unhappy part. I'm going to have to hex you with boils - horrible purple ones, I'm afraid. Oh, they really will be horrific. It's going to look like some kind of deep-sea creature is writhing under your face, trying to claw its way to true light. But you needn't worry, because it's not going to hurt a bit! It looks like a hex but it's actually that theatre glamour I've been working on. And it only lasts an hour, and after that you'll be back to how you always look.
6) When Professor Raz sees what I've done to you, he'll give me detention, let's hope. And let's further hope that he'll assign me to organise the books in his office, like he did with Vince back in September.

Millie, I must thank you ever so much, from the bottom of my heart, for agreeing to help me with this venture. You are a true friend, and I will make sure that you look absolutely beautiful on the night of the Ball!

Padma, did you have a nice time in Hogsmeade with Davies? You probably weren't in any state to notice, but I didn't go to the village today. I was just so caught up in looking through back issues Cut Above and Posh that I utterly forgot to leave on time, and by the time I noticed, it wasn't worth it to walk all the way out.

There are loads of articles about Professor Razzer. A lot are about his quidditching days, and the things he got up to with his teammates and female fans, and the dates that he brought to important social events. None of it seemed like it might have been about my Mother. Well, none of it except for this:

This Quidditch Star might be benched, but it hasn't kept him from stepping out with an old flame this Valentine's Day! But does her fiancé know that she's been blowing on her old lover's coals? Or that she'll soon be starting to show? This Lady Romeo had better decide who the Father is, or she'll be left in the cold with no ring at all.

It's dated from February 14, 1979.

You don't suppose...

Well, it might be about anyone, but you know how coded these "obscure items" can be. And Lady Romeo?

Mother's maiden name is Montague.